How to be a Good Parent

by Niharika Kulkarni

How to be a good parentImage courtesy of photostock at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Being a parent is not an easy task. It will help you raise your child into a strong, independent and capable adult. Every parent wants to be the best and relationships are highly personal. What works for one may not work for the other. There aren’t any rules about parenting but given below are some guidelines that will help build a smoother relationship between a parent and a child.

Here are some do’s and don’ts while parenting:

Express your love but don’t overdo it

A smile, hug, appreciation and a cuddle can go a long way in building confidence in children. Tell them every day that you love them and let them know that you will always love them unconditionally. But usually the effects of showering too much love on a   child will result in spoiling the child. So it is important to express your love and affection in right amounts and at the right time.

Do's and Dont's of Parenting

Be involved in your child’s life but don’t let them lose their independence.

The task of parenting a child requires changing priorities. It is important to get mentally and physically involved with your child. That doesn’t mean you get so involved you complete his homework; give him the freedom to do the things he should be doing even if he is going to make a mistake. Encourage him. Encouraging independence in children helps them grow into self-confident individuals. Let your presence be felt so he knows you are there with him in every circumstance. This will make him feel secure and helps in developing a better relationship.

Set rules but avoid harsh discipline.

If you don’t correct your child’s negative behavior when he is young it would be difficult to manage him when he is older. The values that they learn are going to shape their life. Do not make too many rules but draw the line and ask them to adhere to it. Do not try to impose rules by beating or swearing, they learn from your behavior and may end up becoming aggressive adults. There are better ways to discipline a child, reward them if they do something good and punish them if their behaviour is bad by giving extra work or reduce their play time.

Change your parenting to fit your child yet be consistent.

Considering that your child is growing up you must adapt to his changing personality, know how age affects the child’s behavior. You cannot behave the same with a 3 year old and a 13 year old child. Change your parenting, according to his developing personality. But make sure that you don’t keep changing rules in an unpredictable manner it might confuse the child and you might end up with a troublesome kid. The more your rules are based on intelligence and not authority, the less it will be challenged.

Listen and support them but avoid rescuing.

Children like talking, they want parents to understand and spend time with them. Show interest in your children,   get involved in their lives and respect them.  Be a friend and support them. Help your children make choices but explain the pros and cons of each option and let them decide what they want to do. Don’t make them dependent by making choices for them.

OTHER TIPS TO TAKE CARE WHILE PARENTING

Devote time: No matter how busy parents are in their social or professional life, it is important to devote time to their children. Spending time with your kids listening to them, playing with them, reading to them or just being with them is more important than you think. Just the presence of a parent matters to a child.

YOUR CHILDREN NEEDS YOUR PRESENCE MORE THAN A PRESENT

Express your love: Telling kids that you love them and express your feelings by various gestures like hugging or kissing which works much more than you think. A simple appreciation or a few words of encouragement can boost children’s confidence and make them feel that their parents will always love them and stand for them.

Create family rituals: Follow special customs and traditions that give you a chance to connect with your child. Reading stories every night, having dinner together, going for weekly outings or anything that you and your child enjoy. It lets you connect with your child and he is sure that even if my parents are busy they will find the time to be with me and most importantly devote time to complete this ritual.

Be a good role model: Children immediately grasp what they see and hear. Parents are a child’s first role model. Your child will try to imitate you and thus you should pay attention to what you do around him. We tell our children to be patient and calm and then we ourselves explode about things that frustrate us. We teach them not to lie and on the other hand we ask them to lie on the phone to a relative that mommy or daddy is not at home. Parents are the ones from whom the kids grasp quickly and unknowingly from a very young age.

Take a break: Take some time out for you, as parenting time can be really draining. No one is perfect and we learn as time passes by. Read, meet your friends or just relax so that you feel good.

Being a good parent means keeping your child happy and safe. If you want your kids to respect your privacy then give them the same in return. Rules that are given to the kids should also be followed by parents. Good parents should be consistent in their parenting styles. Being good to your self is the right way of being a good parent.

Spend happy time with your family

 

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